For the past five or six years, our family has inched closer to "redefining Christmas." For us, it has meant shedding a lot of consumption, as well as redirecting our time and resources to things that we define as more meaningful. Some of our choices seem radical to friends and family. A redefined Christmas is not for everyone. Nor should anyone change traditions that add richness to their family life. If, however, you are looking for ways to step off the hamster wheel of the holidays, maybe some ideas from our "Redefined Christmas 2008" will help. None of this is terribly original. It's simply what we will put in place this year, shedding things that none of really care about, or miss when they're gone:
NO TREE
We will not have a traditional tree. If we get a tree at all, it will be a small, potted evergreen that we will replant in Maine next summer. What we have decided to do is to take the amount we would have spent on the tree, and participate in "Christmas in the City." This organization serves up a wonderful Christmas party for more than 2,000 Boston children living in the city's homeless shelters. Parents provide a list of three Christmas presents for their children. The donor chooses one item, and delivers it to "Christmas in the City" before the party. This year, per the parents' requests, we will get 10-month old Ermoine a Leap Frog Baby Tad, and newborn Isaiah will get some warm baby clothes. (Man, was it fun buying baby things again!)
It seemed that with every passing year, putting up the tree became a source of frustration and argument. As the boys got older, the less they wanted to help string the lights or even decorate. Take it down? That's even less fun. Keith and I would end up haranguing them, and feeling resentful and unappreciated. No one misses the stress, and everyone feels the time and money can be better spent.
NO PAPER CARDS
The waste is immense. The cost of cards and stamps add up. This budget item will also be redirected to "Christmas in the City." A free, fun email greeting from JibJab, featuring all our smiling mugs, will be sent. A few elderly relatives and friends without email will get a traditional card. The task of writing out 50 or more cards would weigh me down every year more than I can express. What a relief of body, mind, and spirit--not to mention the time I get back--to be rid of this task.
ONE WREATH
It's nice to decorate the house a bit. But we will decorate with one wreath, rather than our traditional three. Time, effort, budget all saved.
FAMILY GIFTS
Keith and I have not given each other a traditional Christmas present in more than 20 years. It simply did not mean anything to us, so we disbanded the practice long ago. I got my much-awaited, longed-for tri bike this summer. That was Christmas in June! More than enough for me.
We hope each boy will tell us something special that they want--something they could not get for themselves. For Ryan, it is a new work jacket. The others have yet to check in. It means a great deal to Keith and I to mark the year's end by giving them a gift. It will be one item for each.
FAMILY DINNER
No cut backs here! Breaking bread together with a fine, delicious meal will be the centerpiece of our holiday. The boys will make desserts, and we'll work together to prepare the rest. Our now traditional, yummy, Crunchy Vanilla Almond French Toast will start the day.
TIME AND MONEY SAVED With the time saved by not running around shopping for gifts and decorations, we are so much more relaxed and sane. We are hoping to be selected as one of the families to volunteer at "Christmas in the City," and we'll spend some time doing that in the coming week. With a son in college, it's not always possible to give major donations to charities we support. But with the savings from our "Redefined Christmas" we will donate to two additional organizations: FINCA International and the Fistula Foundation.
If you think about it, the changes are small. But, for us, the ramifications--less stress and giving more to those in need--are huge.
Happy Holidays, Merry Christmas, and Goodwill to All!
