I found a new favorite treadmill at the gym. I call it the "slow treadmill" because when I've run on it the past few times doing my interval work, I've run at speeds I have not been able to maintain for that length of time in many, many years. That treadmill became my friend. My ego stroker. My I-don't-have-to-hide-the-numbers running machine. I mean, it had to be slow, right? I couldn't be running that fast...
Well, today it's an ice/snow/slush fest outside and as a result, the gym was packed. My "slow treadmill" was taken, as were most of the others. I had to run on a "stranger" :). Surely, I'd be back to my old paces. I think you can see where this is going....
It isn't the flippin' treadmill, IT'S ME! Sixteen weeks of hard interval work--which resulted in a 2-minute drop in my 10K time, BTW--and I still didn't believe in the gains I made. Did I think the improvement would just disappear? That the 10K TT was a fluke? That I was too old, and not talented enough to really make any lasting gains? The answers to those questions are yes, yes, and yes. And the lesson here is to change, change, change that mindset. Enough of that already!
I've had some fun today taking the time to laugh at myself a bit for hanging on to these old, worn out, tired thought patterns. I also let myself revel in the payoff of the hard work I've done. The reason I never made gains like this in the past 7 years is that I haven't worked this hard, with this level of dedication, and motivation. In times past I *told myself I was training effectively, but I wasn't. I wanted the improvement to magically appear, I guess. It doesn't, let me assure you of that!
Most importantly, these little discoveries take you steps closer to shedding negative views of oneself that create obstacles where none exist. You tell me--how much better will my training progress if I see myself as capable, and owning my improvements, as opposed to always thinking "I can't," "I'll never"? The words and thoughts we use in training surely mirror how we consider ourselves in other areas of our lives. Like attracts like, and I'd rather live in the glow that attracts more of that heady, positive training energy, than in the dark hole of "I can't."
